So in my last post I had mentioned, okay complained, that I hadn't had my monthly visitor yet. Well, turns out I just needed to be patient and let my body do it's own thing. Although I did get it, I was a little sad that I wasn't pregnant. But I'm guessing God is trying to teach me to be even more patient that I think I am. I know someday He will bless my family and I with another baby, I just have to trust in Him that it'll happen when He sees fit. At the end of January I joined my very first bible study ever with a church I had only attended two times. I was scared out of my mind! For about a year, God has put in my heart to find a new church to grow spiritually with Him. I finally got the courage to do this, despite my husbands effort at first, so I went alone. That first service was amazing, I didn't know how much my heart was aching for sermons like that. The pastor made everything so clear to me, it felt like he was speaking directly to me. When I spoke with the pastor after the second time attending church, he informed me that the women were getting ready to start a new study. Can I be honest with you? I was scared out of my mind that first night of bible study. I was so afraid that these women would judge me and would be able to see all the hardships I had been through. I thought maybe I would been seen as someone similar to Hester Prynne, but instead of an "A" they would see "M" for miscarriage on my clothing. Boy was I ever wrong! These woman were so nice and welcoming. I had no idea that they would welcome a complete stranger to their church so openly, but they did. Over the past few months I have made new friendships. It's amazing when you open your heart to God when He is speaking you, what He will do in your life. We just wrapped the bible study up and are taking a month off before we start our summer one. So many woman have signed up that we have to have 3 different groups, one of which I am leading. If I thought my nerves were crazy attending the bible study then, I can only imagine what they will be like the day that I have to lead it by myself. I do know that God will give me the strength and right words for it, I just have to believe in Him. Since atteding the study I can tell I'm a more confident person and I know its because I had a great leader and the book was amazing in helping me realize some of the stuff I was doing was only hurting me. For example, being jealous of people who seem to have it all (cars, house, family, most of all money) but the study taught me that I'm not equipped to have what they have, both the good and bad. I just pray that I can do the new book justice and make my new friend proud in choosing me to lead this group. Enough about me for now. Have a safe Cinco De Mayo weekend!! God bless